Let It Go! Declare Your Independence

Hi, welcome to the debut of “Let It Go Now.” I”m your host Laura Giles, and it’s Independence Day here in the USA. I was so excited to launch on Independence Day because that’s really what “Let It Go Now” is all about - claiming your independence, your sovereignty to be who you really are by letting go of all the junk that you are not.

 

We all have what it takes inside of us to be who we came here to be. It doesn’t take a degree, great beauty, riches, or an amazing talent. We all have a part to play in this life at this time, and when we don’t live up to that greatness, we not only rob ourselves of that experience, the world is a bit diminished by it too.

 

So, I hope that today, the anniversary of American’s declaration of Independence, you will reclaim your independence too and declare that as of today, you are letting go of the things that have held you captive. 

 

Now the American fight for independence didn’t begin July 4, 1776. That’s the day the founding fathers announced their declaration, but it actually started a year earlier. We didn’t get that freedom until 8 years later. We had to fight for it, and you are going to have to fight for yours, too. Words mean nothing without action.

 

I like all of my clients, and one of the most motivating clients that I’ve ever had would give me a truthful account of what was going on every session. She owned her stuff, and she followed through with the lifestyle changes she committed to making. If she faltered, we used that to find more blocks and let go of them until her path became clearer and clearer and living authentically was easier and easier.

 

She had a really rough childhood. Because her childhood wasn’t the most nurturing, she created a lot of problems for herself as an adult. So by the time she came to me, her life was in a pretty big mess. 

 

She was on the verge of losing her job. Her marriage was very businesslike. Her kids had no boundaries and didn’t listen to her. 

 

The first year of therapy was rough. She had no foundation upon which to build anything strong or lasting on, so before we started tearing things down, we had to build some infrastructure.

 

Our blocks are typically there to protect us, so we don’t want to dismantle that and leave ourselves wide open without healthier strategies. So let’s say that one of her old ways of dealing with this was anger. If we diffuse the anger and now she doesn’t have access to that, what’s going to keep her from becoming emotionally overwhelmed or run over now? 

 

So, we started there. 

 

This lady had discipline! She knew why she was showing up and kept her goal in mind every day. That motivated her to keep going, and about a year in, we had destroyed a lot of the negative self beliefs and replaced them with healthy habits that formed a firm foundation. 

 

The next two years we spent on getting her to a place where she could live in a happy, healthy, functional way. So, it takes some time. How long will depend on what you start with. This lady had chronic post traumatic stress disorder. She was raised by wolves and didn’t grow up in a healthy family, didn’t have extended family to fall back on, didn’t have healthy friendships, a passionate and meaningful work life, hobbies, an engaged partner, or a happy relationship with her kids. That’s a LOT to overcome, and yet she did it. 

 

I’m not saying that she’s completely healed. I am not even sure I know what that is for anyone. There is always something lurking in shadow, but compared to where she came from, it’s night and day.

 

Now, I have another client who suffered medical trauma as a kid. The rest of her life was pretty healthy and normal, but the medical thing just rippled throughout her whole life. And I want to spend a little time on this because I don’t think people realize how common this is, and sometimes the thing that is holding us back is hidden, so I want to share in case you’re listening, you have this history, and it never occurred to you that this might be holding you back.

 

If your kid ever has to go to a doctor or dentist for any procedure, do not leave them to endure it alone. It’s absolutely terrifying for a child to be in the hands of strangers, have hurtful things done to them, and they feel powerless and alone. And if the time in the hospital is extended, like days, weeks, or months, it’s traumatizing. Even a single dentist visit can be traumatizing. The way we do medicine in our culture is absolutely barbaric.

I don’t know if this is still done when babies are born, but taking babies away from their moms and putting them in a nursery with a bunch of other babies is completely insensitive. Babies are conscious beings who can’t speak, but they can feel. They may not consciously remember it later, but the body remembers everything and those memories of being alone, cold, and unheard stay in the body until they are released. 

 

You might be surprised to learn what can be recalled in altered states about being in utero, being born, and being an infant. There is no separation between baby and mom when mom is pregnant. Mom’s thoughts are baby’s thoughts, so thoughts like, “I don’t want this baby” or “I hate dad” are internalized by the infant and can end up being unconscious programs that show up as self-consciousness, feelings of rejection, or self-loathing.

 

What’s done is done, but when you know better, you do better. I’m just putting it out there, so we can do better with the next generation.

 

So the client with the medical trauma, I think because she had a much more stable family life and lots more stability in her adult life, the hidden blocks that she had were easier to dislodge and recover from. We maybe worked together for two months or something like that.

 

It didn’t take that long to remove the block. It was more about the integration piece. When you live with a block for your whole life, it can become part of your identity, so she had to rebuild a bit. 

 

Integration is the process of taking what you gained and making it a part of your new reality. So, let’s say that I spent my whole life up until now believing that I’m good for nothing and I let that go. Since I don’t have any experience of feeling self worth, I’m probably not going to shake off the shackles and start running. I may have to learn to crawl, then walk, before I can run.

 

Or let’s say that I had a negative first love experience that left me with a “Nobody will ever love me program.” Well, I have all of those years before that where I experienced my family’s love and love from my friends, so this might be a lot easier to bounce back from. 

 

Sometimes letting go of baggage can just be easy and uneventful. It’s a one and done type of thing, but it’s usually not something you can just pin point and decide to let it go. If it was, you would have done it already. So, it might take some digging around to figure stuff out. I have created a Special Report with the 8 things that most things fit under and will be talking about those 8 things in upcoming episodes. If you want that Special report now, head on over to LetItGoNow.net and subscribe, and you can get it now.

 

Here’s what I mean about things being hidden. The client with the medical trauma told me about what happened, but talked about it like it didn’t have any impact on her at all. This is pretty typical. Just because something happened a long time ago and doesn’t occupy our day-to-day thoughts doesn’t mean it’s insignificant. I wouldn’t just gloss over something because it happened a long time ago and dismiss it. The body knows the truth, and that’s how we found this. Her body told us. The head might say, “Oh, I’m over that, but it isn’t done until the body says it’s done.” 

 

So, if you really want to be free, you have to get rid of the things you know about and the ones that you don’t.

 

One of the reasons why I always refer to July 4 as Independence Day rather than the Fourth of July is because the celebration isn’t about the date. It’s about what happened on this date. It was a game changer. It was the first time that a group of people defeated a superpower, established rules to preserve the freedom that they were fighting for, and the instigators of that gave power back to the people.

 

In 1839, John Quincy Adams wrote, “The truths of the Declaration of Independence are not limited by time or place. They belong to the nature of man in every age and every clime. They may be subdued, but they can never be suppressed. They are truths at Constantinople and Pekin, at London and Paris, at Charleston and at Philadelphia.” He was saying that we are all born with human rights that cannot be taken away by another person or a government. It sounds crazy today, but the idea that a person was born free and equal was a revolutionary idea. 

 

That idea has been used to gain equal rights for women, people of color, people with disabilities, and people of all sexual orientations. Freedom is not just for some people. It’s for all people.

 

So, today I invite you to think about your freedom to exercise the pursuit of happiness. That’s in the Declaration of Independence too - we have the right of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. If you aren’t there yet, you’ve got some blocks to let go of, don’t you?

 

My mother is an immigrant. She wasn’t born with the rights that I’ve had my whole life. My parents are not pale. Both of them were granted the right to vote as adults. I have facilitated spiritual travel adventures for the past 20 years, and when I was Egypt, and I was talking to my tour guide one day and he told me that the thing he wanted most was to be able to wear shorts. I was speechless. They live in the desert and they can’t wear shorts. If you live in places like North Korea, Saudi Arabia, Uganda, Sudan, France, and Egypt, wearing the wrong thing is a punishable offense. Yeh, did you know that?

It’s the little things, y’all. We have unimaginable freedom, wealth, comfort, and opportunity. Today is a day to give some gratitude to the people who made that happen.

 

I’ve been doing a lot of genealogy lately and I have Mayflower ancestors. I don’t think this is commonly known, but all the Mayflower passengers weren’t Pilgrims. The Pilgrims were the ones who came over to the new world seeking religious freedom. They were essentially saying that they thought the Church of England was corrupt and not fixable, and they didn’t want any part of it.

 

That’s not an insignificant thing. They risked their lives, and in fact only 38 of the original 144 passengers survived, so they were really committed to being able to worship who they wanted to. They were willing to die for it, and most of them did.

 

Here we can worship whatever we want and marry any other consenting adult. It doesn’t matter how young or old, what religion, race, or gender. And if it doesn’t work out, we can fairly easily get divorced. That is not true everywhere.

 

We are free to own land, start a business, defend ourselves, drive, go to school, name our babies whatever we want, and have a right to a fair trial. There are many more things that we are free to do here in the United States, but I hope you are getting the idea of how powerful that independence is.

 

And yet with all that room to wiggle around, so many of us are living mentally shackled by negative programs like “I am not enough,” “I don’t deserve it,” and “I am bad.” Seems silly doesn’t it? To have all that power and not use it? 

 

And we don’t live by what our conscious mind says is true. We live out what the unconscious mind says is true.

 

So, a lot of what is driving us could be hidden because who knows what is in the unconscious? It’s unconscious! But here’s how you can tell. Just look around you. There is evidence everywhere. As above, so below. As within, so without.

 

If you are not going for it, playing small, and making excuses to get out of opportunities, there is almost certainly a hidden program at the root of that. If you think that the block is something like “I can’t get a job,” go deeper. The universe isn’t conspiring to keep you jobless. It’s not karma. There is a belief there that is keeping you from getting what you want. You created it and you can let it go.

 

If you are in the zone, magical opportunities find you, If your life is moving in the direction of your dreams, and you are prosperous, there is a program driving that too. Just look at some of the top people in their field to see that this is true. Mohamed Ali was convicted that he was the greatest boxer. King Henry the IV’s mother drove it into his heart every day that he was the next king of England and he made it so. 

 

So, our situation in life is not a result of luck. It’s not because one person deserves more than another. We all have magic inside. And it’s up to you to release it. It’s like the Wizard of Oz. Dorothy, the Tin Man, The Cowardly Lion, and the Scarecrow were all looking for something outside of themselves to fix them or help them, and they all had it inside the whole time.

 

That’s what “Let It Go Now” is all about - helping you to find that spark inside to liberate yourself from whatever is holding you back so you can flourish.

 

I met this young guy a long time ago who couldn’t really say what his problem was. He was around 18 and hadn’t had a lot of social experience and was really sheltered. I can’t remember what exactly what he was uncomfortable with. He wasn’t prejudiced, I don’t think. I think he was just not familiar with people who were different from him.

 

Anyway, I remember giving him the homework of going to a gay bar to observe the scene. He came back and told me that he was anxious, didn’t talk to anybody, and found it really different from anything that he’d ever seen before. So, I suggested that he go back again.

 

This time he made some friends and felt more comfortable and revealed that he was gay. I actually thought so all along, but I didn’t want to assume. Turns out, sometimes we just need someone to give us permission to be who we are.

 

If that’s what you need, I’m here for you. As long as you aren’t hurting anyone, you can let your freak flag fly! The world needs salt of the earth people, boys and girls next door, and the world needs quirky people. So, wherever you belong, you have a place here.

 

And here’s the thing. It’s typically going to be this easy. This saying, “The truth shall set you free” is really accurate. When we live in truth, energies align and we sail smoothly through life until we hit a patch where things are not aligned with our truth again and we have to work that out. 

 

It’s not a straight path. We’re never done. Life moves in a circle, and this process will, too. Don’t let that discourage you. It’s just how it is. And I think that’s cool. It means that life is a perpetual adventure where we’re always in the process of becoming.

 

So use your freedom to step into your power. Use this power to discover your truth. 

 

One of my favorite rituals is Inanna’s Descent. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Inanna, she is a Sumerian goddess of love, sensuality, fertility, procreation, and war. Her descent is probably the most famous of the Mesopotamian myths.

 

Inanna went to the Underworld to challenge her sister’s authority. Her sister barred the gates to her and made her remove her clothing and power accessories at each of the gates. So when she removes her crown, she’s symbolically removing her godhead and connection with Heaven. This goes on and on until she arrives at the seventh gate naked and bowed low. And stripped of power, ego, and pride is how we all enter into the Underworld, isn’t it? 

 

So, we recreate this experience to find the center of who we are, and each time that we’ve done it, it’s always been amazingly powerful for those who are willing to be that vulnerable. Tears are common. Sometimes there are stories that explain something or illuminate something. Sometimes there are energetic shifts with no understanding of what has happened, but an awareness that it was something needed and powerful. For me, it’s always like releasing another layer that I may not have known I was carrying. I see how much armor I still have and how much looser and relaxed I still could be. 

 

It takes courage to be that vulnerable and let go of the thing that keeps you safe, but when it’s all said and done, as I ascend, I realize that the things I carry with me aren’t really what create my safety. It’s all just baggage. And once you put it down, do you really want to pick it up again?

 

We don’t live in a communist country where everything is controlled. We have freedom and power. Not to mention that most of what binds us isn’t outside of ourselves. It’s inside. It’s mental. So it’s totally possible to let that stuff go.

 

And that reminds me of a story. We have a rule on my spiritual tours. It’s “If you pack it, you carry it.” Traveling around the world is not like traveling in the urban USA. We are often in remote places where there is a three-story hotel with no elevator. The streets are uneven and you need to carry your suitcase because you’ll ruin it otherwise and there is no porter. So, you have to take responsibility for what you bring.

 

One year someone was buying a lot of heavy stuff and she couldn’t get her suitcase closed. She couldn’t get it up the stairs, and she had to rearrange things to get it under the plane’s weight limit. So, it was a big, fat hassle. 

 

I could have helped her, but I didn’t. I could have taken her stuff in my bag, but I didn’t want her to miss out on the lesson. For me, spiritual travel is about letting go of your crap. I don’t know of any better way to make that message hit home.

 

And she got it. After that trip, her packing style changed, as well as her buying habits. The pain of that experience showed her how draining her choices had been, so it was easier to let go. Let your life do the same. We’re always getting feedback about what’s working and what’s not.

The things that we think we want or need are often just excess baggage. It slows us down, costs us money, and inconveniences us. So, is it worth carrying it? 

 

When we combine our freedom with responsibility, we’re no longer waiting for the porter to come get our junk and bail us out or make it possible for us to keep accumulating more stuff. We’re taking all the benefit and burden for our choices. We’re not escaping from or delaying the lesson by passing it off on someone else. We’re living. So whether we are soaring or crashing and burning, we’re the ones at the wheel. And I don’t know about you, but to me that’s an exhilarating feeling. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t want to be along for anybody’s ride. I want to be the commander of my own ship.

 

When you’re the one driving the boat, it boosts your self-confidence and self-esteem. You learn that you can accomplish things and you begin to trust yourself. You gain skills that can be generalized to other things, so you feel competent.

 

I know a lot of people who say that they don’t want to be a burden. All people are interdependent and we need each other sometimes, but when you are a capable, participating part of society, you’re not a burden to your family, parents, or society. You are a contributor. You’re a valuable addition to society.

 

This, of course, enhances your reputation among friends, family, and peers. You become someone others look up to and depend upon. We all need validation, and when you see the ways that you are appreciated and acknowledged, it helps you to believe in yourself. 

 

This typically leads to financial rewards because you’ve got skills, confidence, trust, and know how to use them. This is what I mean when I say that letting go improves your success, relationships, and abundance. It impacts everything.

 

As an American, to me the idea of what it means to be independent is in the words of the Declaration of Independence. “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.” That means that you have an equal opportunity to be you, and to waste that by hiding your light under a bushel is a waste of life.

 

In my work as a past life regression facilitator, I’ve seen plenty of that. In fact, most people are crushed by life at some point and never find that light inside. I am not sure if that’s a true representation of how life goes for humans or if that’s what typically comes through during a regression because those are lifetimes that are still impacting the current one, but it’s kind of depressing.

 

It’s like this. And I’m making this up to give an example of what a series of lifetimes are like. It’s not an actual person’s history, but representative of what I see all the time.

 

Let’s say that in Lucy’s first past life regression, she falls in love, is cheated on, and her partner leaves her for another woman. Lucy is heartbroken and never gets over it. She leaves that life with a “love is not safe” program.

 

Death is not a get out of jail free card. What’s undone and not cleaned up comes right back with us. So the next go around, she’s dies an old maid. Why? Because she set that up! She said “Love is not safe” so she is going to stay away from it. It’s like being bitten by a dog. Unless you heal from that, you’re going to stay away from dogs, right?

 

Okay, so next go around, she gets married, but it’s a loveless marriage. Why? Because love is not safe. We get what we see. 

 

This will happen over and over again in THIS life and the next ones until you get rid of that baggage. I don’t know who said that we don’t have a series of relationships, we have the same relationship over and over again with different people, but it’s true. If we are not living consciously, growing, and healing as we go, we just do the same thing over and over again with different people.

 

I started doing past life regression a L-O-N-G time ago, and it left me with the desire to make sure that I make the most of this opportunity. I will only be here in this body, in this place, in this circumstance one time. So, I want to experience this life. I don’t want to miss it. And I want to move through the hard stuff so I only have to do the hard thing once. 

 

I mean, I may have to climb up a steep hill more than once, but once you’ve done it, you know you can do it so it’s easier the next time, right? 

 

So, no matter what your circumstances are, your mind is free. Even if your body is in prison, your mind is free. In Auschwitz there was a psychiatrist named Viktor Frankl  who was curious about why some people died and some people didn’t. They were all starving. They were all being abused, but some seemed to have hope while others gave up. And he discovered that it was related to the meaning that they assigned to things.

 

It’s the same thing I saw in past life regression. If something horrible happened, a flood, a rape, war, losing all your life savings, and your mind says “That’s it. I’m done” the body might keep going for quite a while, but it’s like the life force just gives up and that person is marking time.

 

We don’t see the whole life when we do a regression. We see what we’re looking for and the emotionally charged parts. When I request that people tell me about someone who is significant in that lifetime, it’s often someone who they had negative interactions with rather than someone that they loved. We hoard love like it’s in short supply, y’all. It isn’t. It’s abundant and just wants to be given away. It’s free. Give it away!

 

If my view from the therapist’s chair and the past life regressionist’s chair is accurate, most of us live lonely, disconnected lives. Don’t you want to change that? 

 

Life’s precious guys. And the mind is super powerful, so it can create a dismal view of life that has to be tolerated, or it can create the vision that it’s an awesome adventure. It’s really up to you. 

 

It’s an exciting time to be alive. Women, people of color, everybody has economic freedom to do things that our grandparents didn’t couldn’t. They probably didn’t have the education, technology, or the cultural permission to explore the way we can now. What do you want to do with that? 

 

I want you to really think about that because unless you are clear, the chances of you getting what you want aren’t great. You might call me up and say, “Hey, Laura, bring me some ice cream.” 

 

Okay. Is that a pint or a gallon? Is that chocolate, vanilla, or pistachio? Is that the store brand or some specialty brand? Do you mean now or a couple of weeks from now? Do you see what I am saying? 

 

And get clear on why you’re ready to take charge of your life now, exercise your independence, and do something different. It’s like the carrot that keeps urging the donkey along. What is going to keep you moving in the direction of living lighter? Freer? More authentic? 

 

Is it money? A person? A dream house? A healthy body? Whatever is driving you, keep that in mind. The road may be long. If it is, having a clear and compelling idea of what is motivating you will keep you going through the rough spots.

 

Got that? Then I invite you to declare your independence from the things that are holding you back. Say no more to the cigarettes, poverty, one sided relationships, people pleasing, or whatever it is that is a less than vibrant, strong, and alive version of yourself. 

 

Know that it may take some time. That’s okay. You have the rest of your life to do this. As long as you keep going, the load gets lighter and easier. It’s really just hard in the beginning.

 

Know that it will take courage. Even if we’re moving towards something that we say we want, you might be surprised at how many people are afraid of having what they want. You gotta be willing to leave behind what was comfortable. Change is not comfortable. It can become the new normal if you stay with it long enough, though.

 

I think about the work that the founding fathers did to create a new nation- all the fighting and dying. They had to figure out how to run the whole thing. It’s a lot of work being independent. You will have to manage your own life, and isn’t that exciting? 

 

And it’s only from that position that your special kind of magic can happen. I can’t wait to see what you do with it.

 

So, I invite you today - whether it’s actually July 4 when you’re are listening to this or not - to declare your independence from your blocks and let this be the day that you start the journey to your freedom. With me? 

 

Each week I will be here talking about letting go. If you subscribe, you will get a notification when each new episode posts. 

 

If you’d like to get serious and have a strategy for this, join me in the Let It Go Now Community where each week a new skill or experience is added that will help illuminate what we need to let go of, prepare us for letting go, or create or maintain that stable foundation so we can stand firmly without those old blocks. It will be like coming up to a new gate in Inanna’s Descent and stripping off something else. In addition, we have a Let It Go Now Community in MeWe where you can hold yourself accountable and post your questions, homework updates, and help each other out. The community has techniques to release emotional blocks. It’s often easier to do them with another person, so you can find a practice partner there. The journey is always easier with company. 

 

I’m Laura Giles for “Let It Go Now.” I appreciate your time. Have a fabulous Independence Day, guys.  See you next week.